donderdag 26 november 2009

Kut Twilight.

Ik heb iets tegen Twilight. Niet alleen tegen de film, maar ook tegen de merchandise. Pleisters met Twilight printje? Nee bedankt. Ik moet toegeven, ook ik heb geprobeerd Twilight te kijken, maar het lukte niet. Teveel glitter en romantiek als je het mij vraagt, vooral als je je realiseert dat je toch echt naar een vampierfilm zit te kijken. Aan deel 2 uit de Twilight saga wil ik me ook niet wagen. Wat ik er tot nu toe van heb gezien zit er veel depressie, half naakt meidensnoep (de weerwolf jongen rent met ontbloot bovenlichaam door het bos) en verwijfde vampiers (was in deel 1 ook al het zelfde liedje).

Mocht ik toch tussen team Edward en team Jacob moeten kiezen kies ik voor team Jacward. Wil wel is zien hoe de echte diehards daarop reageren. <3


3 opmerkingen:

  1. AA T Before the song
    __________________________

    Girl 1: Like OMG! Twilight rocks! Edward Cullen is so hot!

    Girl 2: Girlfriend! I have to disagree! Jacob Black is hotter than Edward!

    Girl 3: I want Eddy Kins to eat me for lunch! *romantic sigh*

    Girl 4: Aren't Eddy and Bella such a cute couple? Stephanie Meyer is such a great writer!

    Girl 5: And so the lion fell in love with the lamb. Aww! So romantic!

    Me: *comes to the table with a lunch tray* Hey guys! I just came to sit with you all so later I can help you with your reading homework! *is wearing a anti Twilight tattoo on right arm*

    Girl 1: Thanks Laura!

    Me: No problem!

    Girl 2: Oh no! TWILIGHT HATER!!!!

    Girl 3: *gasp, to me* How could you hate Twilight!?!? Its the best book ever!

    Me: I'm sorry! I just don't think its a good series for me!

    Girl 1: *with axe* GET HER!!!

    Me: Oh shizzle sticks! *runs*


    Now to song
    ___________________________

    In 2005, Stephanie Meyer, German writer

    Thought "Now I have an idea! I'll make Bella look

    Just like me! Chocolate brown hair! Heart shaped face!

    And since Bella's Italian and Spanish for beautiful! I

    Am beautiful too. My dream boyfriend would save me from

    Danger and he would be a sparkly vampire and would

    Be beautiful too!"

    Then the book spawned into 5 sequels, including a unreleased

    Midnight Sun

    Chorus
    _____________________________
    Oh Stephanie Meyer!

    Your series is a layer

    Of glitter pig crap!

    Oh Stephanie Meyer!

    Everyone knows

    That vampires don't sparkle

    They desintigrate in the sunlight


    A year back
    __________________________

    Me at age 13, heard of Twilight about the movie

    My friends were talking about it

    I was like "Hey! Since when did vampires sparkle?!?!"

    Gabe was like "Since Twilight"

    I slumped and thought "Great, the vampire race has gone down the crapper"


    Chorus
    _________________________________

    Oh Stephanie Meyer

    Your series is a layer

    Of glitter pig crap

    Oh Stephanie Meyer

    Everyone knows that

    Vampires don't sparkle

    They disintegrate in the sun



    Stephanie Meyer

    Your Mary Sue is

    A whiny brat

    That has no personality whatsoever

    Your Gary Stu

    Is way too perfect

    For the love of Pete

    Give him some flaws!

    He is 108 yrs old

    In love with a 18 yr old girl

    Thats plain disgusting

    Thats called pedophilia!

    He's already dead, so thats also necrophilia!


    Chorus
    ______________________________________

    Oh Stephanie Meyer

    Your series is a layer

    Of glitter pig crap

    Oh Stephanie Meyer

    Everyone knows that

    Vampires don't sparkle

    They disintegrate in the sun


    Stephanie Meyer

    Your fanbase is just plain awful

    Some of them are sane (Thank God!)

    But most need to be in a loony bin

    They think Edward's real

    When in the movies he is played

    By a actor from England who does a terrible job

    Its still doesn't mean anything

    Oh Stephanie

    Your fanbase can be hostile

    The haters got injured

    By most of your fanbase


    Chorus
    __________________________________

    Oh Stephanie Meyer

    Your series is a layer

    Of glitter pig crap

    Oh Stephanie Meyer

    Everyone knows that

    Vampires don't sparkle

    They disintegrate in the sun


    End
    ________________________________

    Dracula can beat Edward any day

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  2. ik ben het met je eens, twilight is naar.

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